They still let her have a pacifier! Help!?

Sounds like a power struggle. You and your husband need to make it clear on what the rules are. Does the mom of the child and the grandmother realize that they are actually doing harm to the child. The longer she is allowed to have a pacy it will miss up not only her teeth but the form of her mouth. I suggest that you talk with your pediatrician and dentist about this. Because I know any rep tubal Dr and dentist will tell you that it will end up causing harm to the child's teeth and mouth. Why do you think they tell you kids also need to be off the bottle by the time they are a year old. Both of my kids were off the bottle by the day they turned a year old and my daughter was no longer taking a pacy by the time she was two. Stand your ground with the child's mother and do not allow her to do what ever she wants to me it sounds as if she is one of these moms that just have kids as a trophy and could not care about what is best for them.